Consider it great joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you experience various trials, because you know that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its full effect, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing. ~ James 1:2-4 [CSB]
I’m not much of an endurance runner anymore. During a past life in better physical shape I ran long distances in formations of singing Army recruits, pilot trainees and air cavalrymen. Forging ahead now in formation with God; however, He challenges me to the point of falling out of the pack, something I refused to do in younger days. I gave my physical all to finish runs in the military, necessary training to condition and prepare me to serve my unit as a combat aeroscout pilot.
Endurance with God is not only physical, but also spiritual, mental, and emotional. For me, writing this post about a simple three-letter word has been like running my first marathon. Because when I reach the end of myself, I don’t want to open up some areas of my life that need chiseling. Starting a blog seemed easy but eventually I came to a place where continuing was hard.
Battling dark forces in the spiritual realm isn’t where I want the formation to go. Rather than going up and down the hills, LORD, can’t we just run on level ground where I don’t have to face trials? Instead of Summer heat, can’t we go on a cool Spring morning? Why so long, God? When will we stop? Why is the spiritual fruit of joy not seeming like much fun?
Joyful trials + Faithful endurance = Spiritual maturity
Contemporary musician John Legend sings ‘All of me.’ You may have heard it:
‘Cause all of me
Loves all of you
Love your curves and all your edges
All your perfect imperfections
Give your all to me
I’ll give my all to you
You’re my end and my beginning
Even when I lose I’m winning
‘Cause I give you all, all of me
And you give me all, all of you
Source: LyricFind
Perfect imperfections.
In life, I’ve grown to appreciate imperfections because I realize only God fills the gaps and makes them whole. He gives the grace and discernment to appreciate small gifts in the race of life. Hugs from my kids, smiles from my wife, a restful sigh from a dog laying faithfully next to me at the end of a busy day. Strength to keep running in formation when I want to quit. None of these are things, or words – they’re simple life happening in God’s pace, His time.
Imagine me sitting at the keyboard of my computer with sweaty hands and nervous knees. I’m getting ready for a big checkride, or important interview, or a speech in front of hundreds of people. Here’s my challenge. My love language is words of affirmation. I want people to see how great I am and tell me so. In opening up the window of my heart and saying that, I’m afraid of others knowing my secret fear. But I need to confess and allow God to have it, rather than holding on and living behind a plastic mask of ‘look how great I am.’
Instead, I want to see perfect imperfections. Not things or words, but simple blessings. When I look, God is faithful to show them to me. And when I see, I focus on myself less and on God and others more.
In the 1997 film Good Will Hunting, actor Robin Williams described imperfections in romantic relationships to Matt Damon as ‘the good stuff.’
We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God,
who are called according to His purpose. ~ Romans 8:28 [CSB]
But giving everything up to God is hard for me. Really hard. I sing “I surrender all” and think I gave it all up. My flesh continues to seek approval with title, image, appearance. In the midst of my struggles I find myself needing constant affirmation and nurturing from the Holy Spirit – I’ve got you, I’m for you, I’ve forgiven you. In my own strength, I strive to achieve that one more thing, the project, the initiative, the product, the title, the accolade – yet when I see someone else getting what I think I want, I get frustrated. Instead of humbly feeling true appreciation and admiration, thoughts of jealousy, envy, malice creep in. A post on Twitter, Facebook, where someone gives appreciation to another instead of me. I’ve been left out of the thinking, feeling hurt and betrayed.
Wait… stop! As I take captive that thought, what I realize I’m appreciated by my creator. In Christ, I’m affirmed, redeemed, rebuilt (in progress), restored. While somebody’s occasional ‘atta boy’ provides me temporal fulfillment, what I truly need comes from my eternal creator.
Giving everything up to God is hard for me.
Really hard.
When I think about perfection, full effect, complete, lacking nothing – the only way I can measure up is through God’s grace and daily provision. Because I know how inadequate and [gulp] sinful my nature can be; however, in Christ I can take captive my thoughts and be transformed. Perhaps His way of allowing me to grow is for people NOT to constantly affirm me. Let’s consider something – absence of affirmation is NOT condemnation. And by the way, I’m in Christ, so there is no condemnation anyway.
If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins
and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. ~ 1 John 1:9 [CSB]
God, thanks for Your grace in allowing me to live without words of affirmation from others, and to experience Your provision without words, but perfect imperfections of life. Help me see Your perfection in the small things. Continue Your work as I run with You to produce endurance in me. You’re not done, LORD… -Amen.
Is God still at work in you?
What can you place at His altar?
Flight and Faith Blog:
drmitchellmorrison.com